LOG CANOEING



These are a little too small... for sailing down the river. Amanda says the mushrooms probably won't work either.

Maybe I can tie two of them together?

I heard tell the Indians hollowed logs out and sat in them and then sailed down the river. But that doesn't make sense to me.

No, you have to sit ON TOP of a log to sail it. Everyone knows that.

So, I just need to find one that is light enough for me to lift and big enough too float both Amanda and I on it.

Silly Indians carving up good sailing logs... Sheesh

Amanda Won't Cut Her Hair:

That's OK... It's like hippie person length. I think it keeps her warm in the winter.

It's like a coat. A long one.

She washes it in the rain barrel next to the cabin.

When she tosses it back it makes this fapping sound on her back. Almost like she's being whipped or something.

She stands in front of the mirror and combs it upside down and the tosses it back again...

She will never cut it.

Hay sandwich (for all you vegatarians out there)

This recipe is real simple:

1. Two slices wonder bread

2. Hay

3. Italian Dressing

ENJOY!!!

I REALLY LIKE SQUIRREL SANDWICHES

And they are really simple to make!!! Take one big fat squirrel + two slices of Wonder Bread + heeps and heep of Miracle Whip...

No do not cook the squirrel...

No do not skin the squirrel...

In order to get the full falvor you must eat the squirrel whole!!!

MORE FUN WITH RECIPES:

Fried Squirrel
With Onion Gravy
5 dressed squirrels, cut in serving pieces
Flour, salt and pepper
4 slices bacon
1 cup peanut oil
1/8 cup flour
1/2 cup water
1/3 cup chopped onion
Season flour with salt and pepper and
coat squirrel. Fry bacon in large skillet.
Remove bacon and drain on paper towels.
Crumble bacon and set aside. Add peanut
oil to drippings in skillet and heat over
medium heat. Add squirrel pieces and cook
until tender. Remove squirrel from pan;
drain on paper towels. Reserve 1/8 cup
drippings in the skillet.
Make gravy by adding the 1/8 cup flour
to the drippings, stirring until smooth. Cook 1
minute, stirring constantly. Gradually
add water, stirring well. Add onion and
cook over medium heat, stirring constantly
until thickened and bubbly. Season to taste
with salt and pepper and top with bacon
crumbs. Serve for breakfast with hot
biscuits, hash browns and muscadine jelly
on the side. Serves 5 to 10.

(Yes, but try catching five squirrels at a time)...

I prefer fried squirrel cream pie:

1. 5 squirrels

2. Sugar

3. cream

4. Milk

5. flour

6. Sara Lee Pie crust

7. M & Ms

Skin and fry squirrels in deep deep deep fat LARD... mix. Dump squirrel paste into pie crust. Add: milk, sugar, flour and cream... put in the refrigerator, so that squirrel fat turns to jello.

Ready to serve!!!

FOREST FLOOR/TREE DWELLERS

This is my favorite view from the forest floor. I lie on a bed of sticks and fauna and stare until the wood bends.

Until the sun shifts.

I like the shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhsssshing sound of the leaves. It's restful.

The Tree Dwellers are sleeping usually during the day. They wear hoods and they look at me with piercing yellow eyes.

I will lie here forever. I don't want to move. I won't even scratch that ant off me walking up my leg.

The sun has burnt my face, in patches taht the leaves don't shade.

I heard the music of the forest: the clicking and cawing sounds, the scuttling hyere and there... the rapid movement through the undergrowth.

VIRGINIA PINES

Wheeeew... tough to get through these old woods. We had to cut a path.

But now we are able to take the shortcut through the Virginia Pines to get to the bakery.